i thought i had lost you, but it was really you who lost me. (sounds like a song, but i really dont know where it is from. it appeared in my head. but i'm too lazy to look it up online.) i lost my wallet. but it turned out to be in my backpack. in the wrong pocket. i wish i had those old jansport backpacks, with 2 pockets. instead of this huge backpack. but i need a place to put my laptop. irritating. wallet. wall, etc. wall-e. wall-e.t.

so i watched a japanese medical drama. some woman falls down the stairs so they removed her spleen. i really don't get it.

always feel inferior. never enough to write. i'm not good enough. don't deserve it. failure.

Is there an up-age limit for Olympic athletes? Most America female athletes looks older than 30, I thought that's too old for gymnastics.

rofl

lol at nbc reporters. "wow she did a great performance, but not as good as nastia! lol!" "in my opinion, nastia did it the best." more opinionated reporting please. its a subjective sport so too bad! cry me a river. but it was pretty cool to have a tie. too bad the chinese girl is probably underage.

the problem with photography is that it has become so easy to take so many pictures. now everyone just gets a digital camera, slr or not and then take a billion pictures. and one of them will be okay. it has just become a statistics problem based on how many pictures one can take. there has to be a few good ones. it's just accidental. throw away the other trash. when artists made paintings and stuff, there wasn't such a waste. people had to know what they were painting and actually work on a canvas. van gogh painted over his paintings, but he already had invested a lot of time. the painting probably just didn't turn out the way he liked it. photography is just shoot shoot shoot. everywhere. there's no more composition or any thought. i think even pollack had some idea when he started to splatter. in photography it is just zomg i'm so lucky.

complain complain. all people do is complain. when they lose an olympic medal, they complain. when someone scores higher than them, they complain. complain complain. if those in question didn't do well, there wouldn't be any questions. people are so annoying. irritating. too bad gymnastics is a subjective sport. maybe they shouldn't have these sports. just have sports where you can measure things. really, how do gymnastics judges judge down to the 0.000 thousanths!? theres too many significant figures.

it's annoying that i like one of utada hikaru's songs now. "beautiful world" was the ending of the rebuild of evangelion 1. and i was like zomg i know this voice. and yes it was utada. i guess i ditched her back then because she was all r&b or whatever. shes all weird and electronic now, so i will retry it. i guess. too bad i'm leaving for new york soon.

emo music from dir en grey speaks to me. its amazing. i must feel horrible. irritating. like before. i write a lot of this. annoying. spring time. is past. summer time. is almost past. almost. almost. everything is always about almost. never. only moves in one direction. what kind of cloth can't be cut? a waterfall! need to know chinese. 瀑布 is waterfall. 布 is cloth. chinese people are weird. making uncuttable cloths. its magic.

i dreamed that i finally got a medical school interview (at albert einstein college of medicine). then i went to the place, but realized i didn't dress nicely and bring the 2x2 photograph. so i went home and did that stuff. in the end, i was late and missed it. nightmares, they plague me.

hello world.